Hear What I am Doing

Please, mom, hear what I am doing; see what I am saying.
The world is a crazy, confusing, scary place for me.
I can't do the things other kids do -- my body doesn't work right.  But inside, I'm just like other kids -- I need to be loved and appreciated;
I need to belong, to fit in; I need to contribute, to be useful;     I need to be heard and understood; I desperately want you to be proud of me.

I want to tell you my needs, my feelings, my thoughts, but they get trapped inside me because I can't get my mouth to say the words.  There gets so much piled up inside me that sometimes it just blows up everywhere.  And I know you're disappointed in me, and you get angry at me, and somehow, it's all my fault.

My actions speak so loudly, you can't see what I am saying.  Yet, my actions are my saying.  My body says what my mouth can't.  I act out my feelings, but often, the acting out is such a problem that my feelings go unnoticed.  But I have no other way of telling you my feelings.

I want to cooperate, to succeed, to contribute, to feel good about myself, but to do that I must be heard.

Please, mom, hear what I am doing; see what I am saying.

Carolyn Hunsinger